I grew up in the 70s. It conjures up different images for different people: disco, bad fashion that included butterfly collars and bell bottom pants, the Brady Bunch, etc. My personal favorite icon of the 1970's is the station wagon. It was the minivan of our generation. We had a blue Gran Torino. And we didn't sit in the back seat with our seat belts on. My little sister Michelle didn't sit in a car seat. We rode in the back. For our comfort, my dad installed some old carpeting on the station wagon bed. After all, it would have been ridiculous for us to sit on that hard surface. Carpeting was necessary and seatbelts were not. That was the 70's.
My dad earned a doctorate at the Brazilian school of driving. This meant breakneck speed, sudden lane changes, and the absence of pedestrian right of way. It was vehicular darwinism and my dad was at the top of the food chain. My dad's driving skill was his gift and he shared it with us all. It even involved lessons in physics. There were a couple of learning games we used to play.
Game 1: Centrifugal family force 3. This game involved taking the exit ramps with minimal use of the brakes. I sat on the opposite end of the turn, followed by Sandra, the next oldest, and Michelle, the youngest and smallest. When my dad took the turn we all slid over to the opposite side of the car. I was smashed with my face pressed up against the window, Sandra was smashed up against me, and Michelle was smashed up against us both. And there we remained for the duration of the ramp, Immobile and conjoined as one giant three-headed offspring. When we finally reached the end of the ramp, the force released and we all went back tumbling the other way with Michelle taking the brunt of our weight this time -- though she proved to be remarkably durable for a little one.
Game 2: We affectionately called this game "Stop and Go".
This game had 3 laws.
Law 1) Children in motion tend to stay in motion until acted upon by an outside force
Law 2) Children at rest tend to stay at rest until acted upon by an outside force.
Law 3) If child A exerts a force by crashing into the back seat,
then the back seat exerts an equal and opposite force on child A.
This game involved us three kids and sometimes some cousins sitting in the back of the the Gran Torino. When we sat in the back, my dad would randomly slam on the brakes sending us tumbling toward the front of the wagon. This was the part we called "Stop". The second part, of course, would be my dad jamming on the accelerator and sending us tumbling toward the back of the wagon. That was "Go".
Science can be fun.
It wasn't all fun and games, however. Sometimes there were experiments gone awry. One such experiment involved my dad's lighter, a paper Marshall Field's bag, and that old carpeting in the back. I was flicking the lighter on and off when I noticed the reflection inside the bag. That looks pretty cool, I thought. What if I brought the lighter closer? Or better yet, what if I flicked the lighter inside the bag. That would surely be an awesome display. And that it was. The whole bag went up in flames when I accidentally brushed too close to it with the lighter. It wasn't long before the dry old carpeting also lit up like a Christmas tree. We had an Emergency 51 on our hands. My dad pulled the car over to save us from my my brilliant idea. How he did this was remarkable in and of itself. My dad has these huge, thick hands.He had bratwurst for fingers. He sent this enormous hand down on the flames and slammed down repeatedly, over and over again until the flame was out. The fire was no match for my dad's built in oven mittens and his adrenalin. It was over almost as soon as it started.
But now what? I worried that those same hands would get me next. My dad looked at me and I looked back -- but when he saw how I frightened I was about the fire, he relented. He rolled his eyes, shook his head, then turned around and drove. No need for punishment. There was no way in Hell I was ever going to try that stunt again.
